In Memory of Pets

I lost my cat MinMin yesterday. he was only over 1.

i had him since he was a little kitten, although after this i took in 2 more strays. the 2 strays werent kittens so it wasnt the same feeling with them as it was with him. when i woke up in the mornings he used to bang me with his head to get petted, and he used to lay in my arms like a baby when i stroked his head. i love him so so much.

Yesterday morning i was concerned because he hadnt come home, as i leave the bottom window open for him.

When i was leaving for work i looked up the road and saw a little black thing in the distance and i knew right away it was him.

i drove up so hard onto the busy road, and squealed and roared when i saw it was him. i squealed so loud that my neighbour could hear me near the road.

my heart is breaking, and i mean breaking. i have never been this sad before. i buried him in my garden last night, and i spoke to him last night and this morning. but everytime i look around my house at the little spots where he used to lay or sleep, or play i break down again. although having the other 2 cats is comforting i cant cope.

i lifted one of my other strays today for a cuddle and they wiggled away from me and i broke down and started saying, minmin never pulled away from me and the tears started flowing again. no cat would ever be able to replace him, because he was so unique and such a mummys boy. he would cry when i called him, and cry while running into the house to see me. then when i left in the car he would stand in the garden and cry for me...


please can someone help me, as i dunno what to do. my partner is losing the sympathy now and things im goin on an on about 'JUST A CAT.' no one understands how i feel.

i am breaking down now even writing this...

My partner said, oh il get u a new kitten, but i dont want anymore kittens or animals as i cant bear this pain if anything happens again. and as i live near a busy road im just waiting now for it to happen again.

when i found my cat he wasnt on the road, he was on the path, so i think he got hit, and ran on in shock, got onto the path and couldnt make it anymore, he was only a few metres from my house, he just had to get thru the little bush path he went on and into the garden!
thats whats killing me the most, did i call him, and he heard me? and when he was running to come home, did he die at that point?

he wasnt flat, he was normal, no cuts or anything, like he was sleeping!


PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE help me someone. i dont think this pain will ever go away. he was one of a kind and i love him so so much.

what can i do to take this pain away?

first, I'm so, so sorry about your little minmin

I know that from the depths of despair, it's hard
to remember that this will ever change for you and that
the intense pain will go away

and the people around us do tend to say things like "it's only a.." and "I'll get you another one", they mean well I think, they just don't get it on the same level

losing a beloved pet is among the hardest tests we ever
come up against in life

the only thing that ever really helped me - after the initial shock and grieving as long as I needed to -
was to conciously steer myself away from it when sad and painful what ifs and why's would come up.

With nothing in my power to change "what is now", I have only the power to figure out how to make it better, in any way possible

I forced myself to focus on one of a million happy memories

give yourself a little bit of time, you just lost a dear friend

I've lost two little cats (black too!) to cars over the years- and it's a different sort of pain. I think we tend to find ways to blame ourselves

be good to yourself, and I promise, it will get better

I am so sorry for the loss of your Minmin,

As Zoo says, people often think that they are helping you by saying things like "only a cat' ...

I am sure that they mean no harm, the problem is, that they do no good. You had a vry special relationship with your little one and no one could or should ever try and take that away from you.

I have lost little ones to car accidents too and it is just as painful as losing them to illness... it is loss and we take it hard no matter what the cause... and no matter how they are taken from us, we all seem to try and work out how it happened and how we could have prevented it...

Th sad truth is that no amount of misplaced guilt or wishing can bring them back to us...

I am so sorry that you are going through such intense pain of loss, but I can also say that you have come to a place wher we understand. We hav loved and lost too, and we will never make the mistake of dismissing a beloved companions importance in your life... becaus we all know very well the amazing friendship that we recieve from them, the amazing unconditional love is like no other .. we should be so lucky to have the same kind of relationships with humans!

My heart goes out to you and your Minmin and you are in my thoughts and prayers!

Take care,

Kerry

_________________
Friends of the heart never truly leave us. They are with us always in all ways.

I am so sorry that Minmin left you! I know how terrible it is to lose your furbaby. I think you should cry all you want and be as upset and you need to be. It will help! I know my family thought I was losing it when I couldn't stop crying after my Lucy died a few days ago. I am still crying. It's ok! It really is.

Here's is a thought that has helped me so much deal with the pain: No matter how bad the pain, all of the pain is worth the love our Lucy gave me. I wouldn't settle for less pain if it meant less love. The pain is so that I will never never never forget her and she will always be part of who I am.

Your sweet minmin is at the rainbow bridge happy and free. Maybe Lucy is there playing with her. cw

I am so glad I have another pet loss site to come to since the other one I was on shut down. I know exactly how you feel-these are not "only cats" they are very special special parts of our lives, our heart! People often say how lucky these kitties are to have us, but I believe we're the lucky ones to have had them in our lives. I lost my Miss Spook about 3 years ago, and I felt just how you must feel now-I still tear up thinking about her, as I am now. This is expected-it's part of grieving-and it's perfectly normal. Our babies are up there still looking out for us and all the other kitty babies down here. You are in mine, Miss Spook's, Georgie's, and my current darlin, Miss Morning Glory's prayers.

To Zookeeper:

Your advice to kittens4life was wonderful-and I think I'll take it too-I often get those feelings of guilt and painful why's and what if's, (years ago someone I knew deliberately harmed a cat-he made it okay, the cat did, and he's probably at the Rainbow Bridge now, but for years I felt a horrible guilt over this incident even though I didn't commit or witness the act-but I did see the kitty the next day with a wound on his head-) I felt absolutely crushed and guilty, because I believe all animals are precious! He was a sweet black kitty I dubbed Zephyr because he came and went like a warm summer breeze-after his owners moved I didn't see him again) the same why's and what if's came up when I lost my Miss Spook 3 years ago, then thought of Georgie, whom I lost is 1991-when these thoughts come up, I try SO hard to do what you advise-to consciously steer away from those why's and what if's-and remember all the wonderful times and memories I have of my kitties and ones I have met, and what I can do now to help others in need, and know how much my current darlin Miss Morning Glory, former shelter kitty, means to me and keep my heart open to the unconditional love she gives. And, it makes one feel better just to talk about it.

hi angelcatz,

some days it's harder than others, right ?

I so know what you mean about revisiting negative past experiences - and sometimes it's hard not to go there

we just have to remember to come back to the good that
has come from the negative; there is always something

I have positively adored animals; and have always tried to be a loving, responsible, competent pet owner

still, over the years, I have experienced stunning failure

but like you, I've tried to move on and make changes, learn from my mistakes and love to pieces my current four legged posse (three cats and a dog! and I don't even speak cat)

I think the most important thing we can do, after treating our own loved pets with care and respect

is to share that with others, in any way we can. I was a pre-school teacher for, I like to say a hundred years

I can tell you with certainty that NO CHILD left my classroom without a new appreciation for the beauty of the animals we share this place with and a special love

miss morning glory's a lucky gal

I LOVE IT!

Teaching love, appreciation and compassion is what can save the world!

Love your work Zoo.... always have!



To you my friend, you the friend of all animals too (lucky us!)

Cheers,

Kerry

_________________
Friends of the heart never truly leave us. They are with us always in all ways.